Murder on the Orient Express

Murder on the Orient ExpressDirector: Kenneth Branagh
Run Time: 1h 54m
MPAA: PG-13
Stars: 1.5

All aboard! For the longest train ride of your life. (Yes, even longer than Snowpiercer.) Continue reading

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Thor: Ragnarok

Thor - RagnarokDirector: Taika Waititi
Run Time: 2h 10m
MPAA: PG-13
Stars: 3.0

What I Love: Taika Waititi, Chris Hemsworth, their real-life bromance
What I Do Not Love: Taika’s cinematic love letter to Rock, Paper, Scissors (starring Chris Hemsworth)

Strap in for Marvel’s Thunder, Fire, Death: A Comedy Continue reading

John Wick: Chapter 2

john-wick-2Director: Chad Stahelski
Run Tim: 2h 2m
MPAA: R
Stars: 3.5

John Wick base rating: 2.0 stars
Significant plot advancements: +1.0 stars
Equally epic action: +0.5 stars
Insufferably long runtime: -0.5 stars
Not killing the damn dog: +0.5 stars Continue reading

Inferno

infernoDirector: Ron Howard
Run Time: 2h 1m
MPAA: PG-13
Stars: 1.5

Irony: not being able to decide if you’d rather suffer 2 hours in Hell than watch a movie about it… OR … if watching said movie for 2 hours is in fact Hell. Continue reading

Don’t Breathe

dont-breatheDirector: Fede Alvarez
Run Time: 1h 28m
MPAA: R
Stars: 4.0

Don’t Breathe is rightly named. Not just for the characters’ sake, but for the audience as well. My lungs had to remind me to inhale several times watching this one. Continue reading