The Greatest Showman

Greatest Showman, TheDirector: Michael Gracey
Run Time: 1h 45m
MPAA: PG
Stars: 3.5

Sun is up and the color’s blinding,

Take a world and redefine it.

Leave behind your narrow mind,

You’ll never be the same.

Come alive, come alive!

Continue reading

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Spider-Man: Homecoming

Spider-Man - HomecomingDirector: Jon Watts
Run Time: 2h 13m
MPAA: PG-13
Stars: 3.0

Messy timelines aside, I was not as impressed with Spidey’s stand-alone feature as I was with his cameo in Captain America: Civil War. Continue reading

John Wick: Chapter 2

john-wick-2Director: Chad Stahelski
Run Tim: 2h 2m
MPAA: R
Stars: 3.5

John Wick base rating: 2.0 stars
Significant plot advancements: +1.0 stars
Equally epic action: +0.5 stars
Insufferably long runtime: -0.5 stars
Not killing the damn dog: +0.5 stars Continue reading

The Girl on the Train

girl-on-the-train-theDirector: Tate Taylor
Run Time: 1h 52m
MPAA: R
Stars: 1.5

If you’re a fan of Lifetime movies, you should skip this review and just go watch The Girl on the Train. It’s right up your alley. Reading any further will only upset your fragile mind because I will be harshly judging you for the next few minutes. Continue reading